Yarn Over
by Sir-Mercutio-McHuffer
Summary: The whirlwind that is Thor happens, and Darcy's fingers twitch to make him a beanie but she simply cannot, because hiding that glorious Thoreal hair would just be sacrilege. So she knits him some legwarmers, because she just cannot help herself.
1. Chapter 1

**AN:** I accidentally a thing. I really really accidentally a thing here.

This has been spinning in my brain for a while. It'll be told in snippets because this is so much easier for me to write around uni and study and looking after my menagerie and fueling my own knitting addiction. I am going to sacrifice some things to yarn, so there are likely to be a few little deviations from Movie-verse.

Also, while this starts in Thor, it's primarily set in Avengers, so I'm popping it in there.

 **Disclaimer:**

I own nothing you recognise. This is all completely un-beta'd and totally fresh off the top of my brain!

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Darcy Lewis is, like all Lewis women, a knitter.

Actually, that's the understatement of the century. Darcy Lewis is a yarn-a-holic. She picked up her first crochet needle at four and hasn't put it down since. Anything that involves yarn, or even fleece, Dary Lewis does. Crocheting, knitting, weaving, felting, spinning, even gluing yarn to canvas in swirls and whorls, Darcy has done, or still does.

It's an addiction she has never managed to (or wanted to) break. She managed to partially fund her life at college after perfecting the art of knitting while reading. Her stash, which she swore would never get bigger than that one shelf at the bottom of her bed, soon expanded to under her bed, on top of other books on the book shelf, in her side-table and stashed around her desk.

When she moves to intern with Jane, she takes her stash, grimly determined to bust through it before she returns to university. She expects to have to squeeze in stitches around monitoring machines and research requests.

She crochets up three beanies the first day – one for each of them – around making sandwiches and coffee appear at the mad scientists' elbows. Jane looks up as Darcy crams the beanie onto her head. "I'm keeping you," she says, matter of fact. Darcy grins.

"Only if there's a good yarn shop around here."

Jane mumbles something about quantum entanglement and teleporting the world's best yarn shop as she turns back to her mad sciencing, sucking down the mug of coffee Darcy placed there moments ago.

Darcy grins, grabs her knitting needles and some nice chunky alpaca, and plops her feet up on the tiny couch.

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	2. Chapter 2

**AN:** I actually wrote four little snippets last night in one go. I'll probably write a few more - I've got most of them stirring around in my brain. Thanks to everyone for their favs and watches. Thank you EmeraldDraegon - this is pretty much a knitting crack fic. It's going to just get funnier. Just wait for the titcap.

 **Disclaimer:**

I own nothing you recognise. This is all completely un-beta'd and totally fresh off the top of my brain!

* * *

The whirlwind that is Thor happens, and Darcy's fingers twitch to make him a beanie but she simply _cannot_ , because hiding that glorious Thoreal hair would just be sacrilege.

So she knits him some legwarmers, because she simply cannot help herself. She just about dies and goes to heaven when Thor wears them one morning in the lab, before the desert chill has been swept away by the desert sun, and proclaims them to be "the most comfortable and luxurious warmers of the leg I have ever had the pleasure of owning". Jane snorts her coffee and Thor rescues her as she hacks and cries and laughs and hacks for the next five minutes.

Darcy tells him to take them off before they leave the lab, though. She's not _quite_ that cruel.

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	3. Chapter 3

**AN:** I should not have eaten all four hotcakes with jam and cream. After having a dinner of apple and mixed berry crumble with cream. Really, really, seriously bad idea.

I remember there was a removed scene where Darcy is rescuing the puppies from the pet store while the whole boom thing is going on and I just had to.

 **Disclaimer:**

I own nothing you recognise. This is all completely un-beta'd and totally fresh off the top of my brain!

* * *

Darcy has never been quite so thankful for her obsessive wearing-of-knitted-things as she is when Megatron-Wannabe hits Puente Antiguo. She makes a beeline for the pet store, takes her beanie off and starts shoving puppies into it. She rips off her cardigan, turns it into a sack, and shoves the kittens in too. Clutching both precious pouches to her chest, she runs.

Amazingly, when the dust has settled and Thor has finished breaking things, the pet shop is still standing. She returns them all to the shop owner, who had been evacuating the other animals at the back of the shop, and leaves her beanie with the puppies who have decided it's their bed now.

She rewards herself with four skeins of a hand painted merino and mohair blend she's been eyeballing for the past three months. The scarf she makes out of that goes to Jane when Thor leaves. It's just as beautiful damp.

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	4. Chapter 4

**AN:** Winter has hit! It is cold! I wish I could knit faster, but I have to study faster!

Now we come to the point where (due to animal and study commitments) I haven't written further. Lengthy delays will ensue as there are only 3 weeks to the anatomy exam.

 **Disclaimer:**

I own nothing you recognise. This is all completely un-beta'd and totally fresh off the top of my brain!

* * *

Agent Agent returns her iPod and is gifted with a little crocheted hand pulling him the finger. "Touch my iPod again and I will _end you_ ," Darcy snarls as she nearly shoves the crocheted finger up his left nostril. He gives her a bland Agent Agent look.

"Miss Lewis, it is unlikely we will be required to confiscate your iPod again. However, in the unlikely event that we do, I will be sure to provide you with the complaints form to fill out and return to us at your convenience," he replies.

She flips both birds at his back as he walks away. He tucks her crocheted hand into his suit pocket.

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	5. Chapter 5

**AN:** Because I firmly believe Agent Coulson is the kind of nerd who would wear the most subtly nerdy things ever, and Darcy is the kind of person who would totally spot it.

 **Disclaimer:**

I own nothing you recognise. This is all completely un-beta'd and totally fresh off the top of my brain!

* * *

Darcy begins to crochet a small army of hands pulling fingers to hand deliver to SHIELD when she sees Thor in the footage of the Battle of New York, knowing full well Jane is hidden in Tromso.

She cries when 'Agent Phillip Coulson' appears on the list of those who gave their lives to save the world. She rips out all of the hands.

She picks out red, blue, white skeins in merino and silk. The strands shimmer as she works them together. She rolls it up and delivers it in person to the SHIELD front desk. "I made this," Darcy says rather redundantly at the blank looked man behind the front desk. "It's for, well, in memoriam Phillip Coulson. He stole my iPod once. And my boss' things."

A light touch on her shoulder has her turn. A slight red-head stands beside her, staring at the silken stitching in her hands. "May I?" the woman asks, face crumpling in the subtle way of the truly staunch. Darcy wordlessly hands it over. She unrolls it. The corners of her lips turn up even as her eyes water. "He would have loved it. Thank you." She rolls it back up. Runs her fingers along the fibres. "I'm Nat," she says, eventually extending her right hand.

"Darcy," Darcy replies, taking the hand and receiving a firm shake. "Agent Agent was a good guy. I'm sorry."

"He was. He will be missed. Thank you for this."

The shining crochet Captain America shield is hung on Agent Phil Coulson's office door. Careful embroidery spells out 'Agent Agent'.

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